There's just one thing I hate more than lying, which is skim milk. It's just water that's lying about being milk. - Ron Swanson You wanna make a baby Traeger? Your hair...my everything else...that kid would be unstoppable. - Donna Meagle Sometimes when I blow my nose, I get a boner. I don't know why, it just happens. … Continue reading My Favorite Parks and Recreation Quotes
"My grandfather says alcohol takes the polish off furniture and people." —Derek Waters, Drunk History host "I remember the first time I ate one of Pepper's little like, butt candies. It was just like, it was just mind blowing. This mixture of evil and beauty. It was like a forbidden fruit. And I thought, you … Continue reading Fucking random awesome things I overheard and wrote down
"Do you like red or white, Blair?" "Hmm. It depends on my mood and time of day." "How about 4 p.m. at a cemetery?"
F Train Poet Overheard on the morning commute and written down verbatim. 2017 ***** You think that I'm a sucker. A lollipop or sumthin. Don't fuck with me. This motherfucker's already been appraised... in the jewelry store. That's where I be at. In the kitchen cookin' pieces for my baaaby. RDM RECORDS! Damn. I wish … Continue reading F Train Oracle